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	<title>Comments on: “Papa Don’t Preach!”</title>
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	<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/</link>
	<description>A civil rights blog promoting informed discourse on issues of race, justice, equality and democracy.</description>
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		<title>By: Pat Fields</title>
		<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-8061</link>
		<dc:creator>Pat Fields</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 22 Aug 2010 14:19:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedefendersonline.com/?p=10024#comment-8061</guid>
		<description>Sorry, Stacy.  The President has to be able to chew gum and walk at the same time.  You are echoing the Republican party line in your piece.  So far off the mark.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Sorry, Stacy.  The President has to be able to chew gum and walk at the same time.  You are echoing the Republican party line in your piece.  So far off the mark.</p>
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		<title>By: Susan</title>
		<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-7905</link>
		<dc:creator>Susan</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 15 Aug 2010 11:18:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedefendersonline.com/?p=10024#comment-7905</guid>
		<description>&#039;I forgive my old man because i don’t believe he was equipped with the right tools and strategies of fatherhood. blokes will not read parenting books, nor go to parenting groups becauise all too often they are geared towards Mums.&quot;

Another lame excuse given for why fathers aren&#039;t more involved. Since childhood, most women are saturated with textbooks, novels, newspapers, radio/tv programs, and other media that uses the pronouns &quot;he&quot; and &quot;him&quot; to describe the average student, reader, or audience member. The word &quot;man&quot; is frequently used as a generic term to describe the average human being. Does this mean girls and women shouldn&#039;t bother to read a newspaper or learn any kind of academic subjects? No, and fathers aren&#039;t excused from reading parenting books or discussing parenting issues just because they are geared toward mothers. There isn&#039;t anything in those books that a man can&#039;t learn unless it&#039;s breastfeeding. OTOH, a man might learn how to support and encourage his partner&#039;s breastfeeding decision a lot better if he did read that stuff. That said, I&#039;ve seen parenting books specifically geared toward fathers. There isn&#039;t any excuse for not being more involved. Period. 

&quot;Society has not yet fully embraced the concept equal parenting, in many ways dads are the forgotten parent, BUT with more Mums working and more dads falling out of work (GFC etc..) there is a trend for dads to be more involved.&quot;

Another lame excuse. In most two earner families, moms have managed to work full-time jobs and remain fully involved parents for decades. That said, moms who are the sole breadwinners still do the lion&#039;s share of the housework and childcare even when dad stays home (in most cases). Mothers remain involved parents whether they work full-time, part-time, or not at all. Fathers have no excuse, and those who use their employment to justify their lack of parental involvement have even less excuse.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8216;I forgive my old man because i don’t believe he was equipped with the right tools and strategies of fatherhood. blokes will not read parenting books, nor go to parenting groups becauise all too often they are geared towards Mums.&#8221;</p>
<p>Another lame excuse given for why fathers aren&#8217;t more involved. Since childhood, most women are saturated with textbooks, novels, newspapers, radio/tv programs, and other media that uses the pronouns &#8220;he&#8221; and &#8220;him&#8221; to describe the average student, reader, or audience member. The word &#8220;man&#8221; is frequently used as a generic term to describe the average human being. Does this mean girls and women shouldn&#8217;t bother to read a newspaper or learn any kind of academic subjects? No, and fathers aren&#8217;t excused from reading parenting books or discussing parenting issues just because they are geared toward mothers. There isn&#8217;t anything in those books that a man can&#8217;t learn unless it&#8217;s breastfeeding. OTOH, a man might learn how to support and encourage his partner&#8217;s breastfeeding decision a lot better if he did read that stuff. That said, I&#8217;ve seen parenting books specifically geared toward fathers. There isn&#8217;t any excuse for not being more involved. Period. </p>
<p>&#8220;Society has not yet fully embraced the concept equal parenting, in many ways dads are the forgotten parent, BUT with more Mums working and more dads falling out of work (GFC etc..) there is a trend for dads to be more involved.&#8221;</p>
<p>Another lame excuse. In most two earner families, moms have managed to work full-time jobs and remain fully involved parents for decades. That said, moms who are the sole breadwinners still do the lion&#8217;s share of the housework and childcare even when dad stays home (in most cases). Mothers remain involved parents whether they work full-time, part-time, or not at all. Fathers have no excuse, and those who use their employment to justify their lack of parental involvement have even less excuse.</p>
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		<title>By: silvereyes1945</title>
		<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-7604</link>
		<dc:creator>silvereyes1945</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 27 Jul 2010 15:07:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedefendersonline.com/?p=10024#comment-7604</guid>
		<description>&quot;And incidentally, Obama wasn’t raised by mom with help from her parents. He was raised by those parents, in a married and middle-class home, without which he probably would have amounted to little.&quot;

And according to the father&#039;s rights movement, ANYONE not raised by their BIOLOGICAL MOTHER AND FATHER in a married, two-parent family will amount to little. The fact that Obama even supports this group is an insult to a lot of different types of families.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8220;And incidentally, Obama wasn’t raised by mom with help from her parents. He was raised by those parents, in a married and middle-class home, without which he probably would have amounted to little.&#8221;</p>
<p>And according to the father&#8217;s rights movement, ANYONE not raised by their BIOLOGICAL MOTHER AND FATHER in a married, two-parent family will amount to little. The fact that Obama even supports this group is an insult to a lot of different types of families.</p>
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		<title>By: shawnie</title>
		<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-7518</link>
		<dc:creator>shawnie</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 25 Jul 2010 06:02:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedefendersonline.com/?p=10024#comment-7518</guid>
		<description>Many successful people grew up without their mothers too.  Among them George Eliot, Marie Curie, Eleanor Roosevelt, Virginia Woolf, Princess Diana, Maya Angelou, Carol Burnett, Jane Fonda, Rosie O&#039;Donnell, and Oprah Winfrey.  Is this supposed to be some kind of evidence that motherlessness &quot;works well?&quot;  Give me a break.  In theory no one is absolutely necessary to a child&#039;s well-being, but we haven&#039;t yet found anything that works better than mom and dad.

And incidentally, Obama wasn&#039;t raised by mom with help from her parents.  He was raised by those parents, in a married and middle-class home, without which he probably would have amounted to little.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Many successful people grew up without their mothers too.  Among them George Eliot, Marie Curie, Eleanor Roosevelt, Virginia Woolf, Princess Diana, Maya Angelou, Carol Burnett, Jane Fonda, Rosie O&#8217;Donnell, and Oprah Winfrey.  Is this supposed to be some kind of evidence that motherlessness &#8220;works well?&#8221;  Give me a break.  In theory no one is absolutely necessary to a child&#8217;s well-being, but we haven&#8217;t yet found anything that works better than mom and dad.</p>
<p>And incidentally, Obama wasn&#8217;t raised by mom with help from her parents.  He was raised by those parents, in a married and middle-class home, without which he probably would have amounted to little.</p>
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		<title>By: Good Man</title>
		<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-7461</link>
		<dc:creator>Good Man</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 23 Jul 2010 14:48:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedefendersonline.com/?p=10024#comment-7461</guid>
		<description>I became &quot;fatherless&quot; at 15 when my father died. I worked as a teen and just took over his duties the best I could. I am offended by this mixture of church and state along with the incredible waste of tax dollars. Men without honor cannot be made to have honor.

Barack Obama gives his mom and grandparents a figurative &quot;slap in the face&quot; by using his father&#039;s last name, by writing a book about his dad, and by promoting this innane &quot;fatherhood&quot; garbage. He should be praising the wonderful upbringing he received by NOT having his abusing father around. Barack became the President of the United States, what more proof is needed that having a father around is NOT what determines if a person will grow up to be successful.

Barack should be promoting having children raised by the mom&#039;s family along with help from her parents. It works well. Mothers should always be sole primary custodians, and all other people involved with her child should be at her discretion. If the mom finds out that the dad is abusive in any way, she should have the right to not have to ever put up with it again. Under these forced fatherhood programs, fathers are favored and very often children are taken away from their moms and given to abusive fathers. Fatherhood programs are misogynistic and demeaning to mothers. Mothers are not being allowed to raise their children without the father&#039;s interference. It&#039;s a nightmare for mothers and children to be forceably subjugated to having a &quot;male guardian&quot; and it reminds me of Saudi Arabia.

Demand the government stop wasting tax dollars on this misogyny.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I became &#8220;fatherless&#8221; at 15 when my father died. I worked as a teen and just took over his duties the best I could. I am offended by this mixture of church and state along with the incredible waste of tax dollars. Men without honor cannot be made to have honor.</p>
<p>Barack Obama gives his mom and grandparents a figurative &#8220;slap in the face&#8221; by using his father&#8217;s last name, by writing a book about his dad, and by promoting this innane &#8220;fatherhood&#8221; garbage. He should be praising the wonderful upbringing he received by NOT having his abusing father around. Barack became the President of the United States, what more proof is needed that having a father around is NOT what determines if a person will grow up to be successful.</p>
<p>Barack should be promoting having children raised by the mom&#8217;s family along with help from her parents. It works well. Mothers should always be sole primary custodians, and all other people involved with her child should be at her discretion. If the mom finds out that the dad is abusive in any way, she should have the right to not have to ever put up with it again. Under these forced fatherhood programs, fathers are favored and very often children are taken away from their moms and given to abusive fathers. Fatherhood programs are misogynistic and demeaning to mothers. Mothers are not being allowed to raise their children without the father&#8217;s interference. It&#8217;s a nightmare for mothers and children to be forceably subjugated to having a &#8220;male guardian&#8221; and it reminds me of Saudi Arabia.</p>
<p>Demand the government stop wasting tax dollars on this misogyny.</p>
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		<title>By: Susan</title>
		<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-7460</link>
		<dc:creator>Susan</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 23 Jul 2010 12:33:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedefendersonline.com/?p=10024#comment-7460</guid>
		<description>&quot;Barack not only grew up without a Dad – he felt like he missed out on growing up with any education about his black self.&quot;

And yet he came from a fatherless home to become (gasp) the first black president of this nation. What a failure! LMFAO.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8220;Barack not only grew up without a Dad – he felt like he missed out on growing up with any education about his black self.&#8221;</p>
<p>And yet he came from a fatherless home to become (gasp) the first black president of this nation. What a failure! LMFAO.</p>
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		<title>By: Darrel Williams</title>
		<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1261</link>
		<dc:creator>Darrel Williams</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 12 Sep 2009 02:01:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedefendersonline.com/?p=10024#comment-1261</guid>
		<description>Glad to hear somebody say that not all kids who grow up without a father turn out damaged or bitter.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Glad to hear somebody say that not all kids who grow up without a father turn out damaged or bitter.</p>
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		<title>By: MarleneAngela</title>
		<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1145</link>
		<dc:creator>MarleneAngela</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 23 Aug 2009 20:48:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedefendersonline.com/?p=10024#comment-1145</guid>
		<description>I think President Obama&#039;s father was more loyal to his country than his own son. He came to America on a special scholarship in the hopes to take his education back to his country and uplift his own community. In the process he left behind his son. Barack not only grew up without a Dad - he felt like he missed out on growing up with any education about his black self.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I think President Obama&#8217;s father was more loyal to his country than his own son. He came to America on a special scholarship in the hopes to take his education back to his country and uplift his own community. In the process he left behind his son. Barack not only grew up without a Dad &#8211; he felt like he missed out on growing up with any education about his black self.</p>
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		<title>By: dave</title>
		<link>http://www.thedefendersonline.com/2009/08/21/%e2%80%9cpapa-don%e2%80%99t-preach%e2%80%9d/comment-page-1/#comment-1144</link>
		<dc:creator>dave</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 23 Aug 2009 10:10:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedefendersonline.com/?p=10024#comment-1144</guid>
		<description>Research has revealed that many parenting resources are too mother orientated and that this is caused many fathers to miss out on valuable parenting support. It is one thing for government to throw money at the problem, but its is important to see these issues with a balanced eye. I had a father who was physically around in the same house but he had no idea / nor showed any inclination on parenting me. there was no engagement and this was hard - because every day was a numb experience for me, it drove a wedge between us and frankly today it has not gottten any better. I forgive my old man because i don&#039;t believe he was equipped with the right tools and strategies of fatherhood. blokes will not read parenting books, nor go to parenting groups becauise all too often they are geared towards Mums. Blokes won&#039;t go to the pub and talk parenting with their mates. WHY? Society has not yet fully embraced the concept equal parenting, in many ways dads are the forgotten parent, BUT  with more Mums working and more dads falling out of work (GFC etc..) there is a trend for dads to be more involved. Resources need to go into programs where dads can receive the right tools. A site in Australia has started to do this. dadsclub.com.au, they use the tag line &quot;becoming one is easier than being one&quot; They look like they are talking to blokes is a bloke way - good on them, this in my opinion is where the resources should go. It ain&#039;t rocket science. Oh and as for my Mum, she tried by frankly outsourced me to boarding school at teh age of 12 - they both thought they were doing the right thing. Th result i was rudderless and after twenty years I am only now starting to find my way. I some way if there weren&#039;t around i think I may have found a parenting role model? Is this unfair?</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Research has revealed that many parenting resources are too mother orientated and that this is caused many fathers to miss out on valuable parenting support. It is one thing for government to throw money at the problem, but its is important to see these issues with a balanced eye. I had a father who was physically around in the same house but he had no idea / nor showed any inclination on parenting me. there was no engagement and this was hard &#8211; because every day was a numb experience for me, it drove a wedge between us and frankly today it has not gottten any better. I forgive my old man because i don&#8217;t believe he was equipped with the right tools and strategies of fatherhood. blokes will not read parenting books, nor go to parenting groups becauise all too often they are geared towards Mums. Blokes won&#8217;t go to the pub and talk parenting with their mates. WHY? Society has not yet fully embraced the concept equal parenting, in many ways dads are the forgotten parent, BUT  with more Mums working and more dads falling out of work (GFC etc..) there is a trend for dads to be more involved. Resources need to go into programs where dads can receive the right tools. A site in Australia has started to do this. dadsclub.com.au, they use the tag line &#8220;becoming one is easier than being one&#8221; They look like they are talking to blokes is a bloke way &#8211; good on them, this in my opinion is where the resources should go. It ain&#8217;t rocket science. Oh and as for my Mum, she tried by frankly outsourced me to boarding school at teh age of 12 &#8211; they both thought they were doing the right thing. Th result i was rudderless and after twenty years I am only now starting to find my way. I some way if there weren&#8217;t around i think I may have found a parenting role model? Is this unfair?</p>
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